You're fired!

I ain't never been fired...but once. Since I've been in business for myself I've had nothing but repeat business and have had no need for business cards on the strength of word of mouth. Now, January is always slow, especially in the last few years. But as soon as the weather stays above 50 degrees F the phone gets to buzzin'! But back to my other jobs. Of course, I worked for my dad for what seems like forever. I started going to work with him in the summer of the year I was 14 years old. I remember scraping paint off of the the old Wake Forest Elementary building for about a dollar an hour...hot as hell! Yep! 40 years ago! I have a book of stories in my head about hanging out with the drunks my dad hired. When they wouldn't show up, or if they did...wanted a loan, I decided I'd be better off to work for myself if my dad ever retired. He was a good boss...to me. If I ever screwed up, he'd give me a raise which, of course only made me work harder. Pretty brilliant, actually!
In my summers in high school I worked at DQ. Yep, Dairy Queen!
Big Edna hired me and I actually enjoyed my time there. 'Course I was making milkshakes and sundaes, fun stuff. Occasionally, I would get stuck on the grill. On Sundays we'd do up to 6...SIX! hot dogs for a dollar! There was a line up the street.
The only other job I've ever had (that I remember), other than songwriter, drummer, recording superstar...was as a kid (lost in the fog of when, prolly during the high school year) was stuffing envelopes somewhere in downtown Raleigh. Who knows what propaganda I was partisan to in doing this but for weeks I was nose to the grindstone, working my ass off filling them things. One night I went to take a piss at the back of the room when I noticed one of my co-workers reaching up behind the cigarette machine. I was a step away from hanging it out getting my piss on and getting back to work but no, I stopped to see what the dude was up to.
He was reaching into the back to grab a few free packs. I ain't never smoked so I didn't want in on the goods and walked off. Or so I thought! AS I walked off the boss showed up, and his ignunt ass fired us BOTH on the spot! Hell, I was just walking by! Whatever! It was a boring ass job anyway. I'da much rather been making milkshakes or scraping old lead paint!