Thursday, August 21, 2008

Sucky Song Olympics

Yes friends, once again, it’s the Sucky Song Olympics. The opening ceremonies were spectacular! A peacock walked across my yard and then went and nibbled a few crackers I had crumbled up for him, that was it, but nonetheless headturning. Today’s challenges includes one of my favorites, Suckingest Song! Wow! For the last few years “Cotton-eyed Joe” has had a stranglehold on this event but we now have some oldies but REAL baddies in the field making a comeback! Oh! Look out! In lane 7 exploding from the mess in the middle is, could it be? Yes! “Run to the Hills” (or whatever it’s called, I never bothered to look) by Iron Maiden. It has just past “Juke Box Hero” by Foreigner and "Barracuda" (finger down my throat!) by Heart, for suckingest, but wait! From the inside in the final turn here comes…yes!...yes!! The worst song ever to hit the airwaves…(my opinion this week anyway)…”The Devil went Down to Georgia” yup! The Charlie freakin' Daniels Band! Who was in that band anyway? Name me one other sumbitch in the band besides Chuck. Dare ya.
Anyhoo...This little ditty restores my hatred for music and is part of the reason why I fight with my life as a songwriter/musician daily. Ya see, I’m sure I can compete but then my competition is HOGSHIT! So then I give up. What can ya say. Ya just do what ya do.
We can’t all be Olympians, like The Charlie Daniels Band!.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Any reference to "Juke Box Hero" always makes me laugh. In 1985, as a huge Joe Walsh fan, I went to see Joe on his "Confessor" tour. Unfortunately for me, he was opening for Foreigner. Joe was great even limited to opening set time. Foriegner was god-awful. Thankfully, there were a couple nice comedic moments to make it a little more palatable. They brought on a big gospel choir all in white robes for "I Want To Know What Love Is". The best was their set ender, "Juke Box Hero" when they had a gigantic inflatable juke box. It must've been four stories high and thirty feet wide. That was funny enough, but then at the end of song which stops with an abrupt chord strike, the damn thing exploded! Woo hoo!!!

Tom C

Mick said...

Hey - leave my record collection alone !!!!